Your neighbour went overboard with the lights again. Walk into any shop, and it’s the same twelve songs on loop. Your inbox won’t stop filling up with party invites. None of it makes you feel festive. It makes you feel more alone.
The guilt is honestly the worst part. You look around, and everyone seems happy. Connected. Ready to celebrate. While you’re just trying to survive the day.
But listen. You’re not the only one. Not by a long shot. So many people feel exactly this way and just don’t say it out loud.
That December Feeling
Regular loneliness is hard enough, but December cranks everything up. You see families crammed into restaurant booths, laughing over appetizers. Couples at the Christmas market holding gloved hands. Friend groups posting photos from their ugly sweater parties.
You’re home eating yesterday’s pizza, scrolling your phone, thinking, “What’s my problem?”
Your person isn’t here anymore. The one who made Christmas actually feel like something. Or maybe your family’s a mess, and you can’t face another tense dinner. Or you took that job in a new city, and you’re still the person who doesn’t know anyone. Or your relationship fell apart a few months back, and now every stupid love song makes you want to throw your speakers out the window.
These are all different stories that come with the same empty feeling. Watching everyone else look happy just makes it worse. As if they all came with some instruction manual you never received.
Stop Beating Yourself Up
You’re not ungrateful. You’re not being difficult. You’re not bad at Christmas. You’re being honest about it, rather than pretending for the Instagram post. The reality is that many other people are faking it, too.
If you look around the office party, you’ll see lots of festive sweaters and forced smiles. People saying the right things, laughing at the right moments. Then they go home, and the smile drops. Some cry. Some just lie there staring at nothing. Some pour a drink and try to forget the whole day.
Other people go the opposite direction. They cancel plans. They avoid anything Christmas-related. They go into full hibernation mode until January.
Both reactions are understandable. Both are ways of coping. But neither one actually makes the loneliness go away. Getting professional support can help you understand what’s really going on.
So What Does Counselling Actually Do?
It’s not someone sitting across from you saying, “Just be grateful for what you have” or “Look on the bright side!” Those lines don’t help anyone.
It’s more like sitting down with someone who won’t judge you for admitting Christmas makes you miserable right now. Someone who gets that grief and anxiety and loneliness all blur together in December.
Talking helps you sort out what’s really going on. Maybe the loneliness is actually grief wearing a different mask. Or old family stuff that December keeps dragging back up. Maybe it’s the gap between Hallmark Christmas and your actual December. Once you see things clearly, you can figure out what might actually make things better.
You might need to tell your relatives no more often. Stop dragging yourself through traditions that feel hollow. And learn to sit with being lonely without your brain turning it into “nobody will ever love me.”
Things Worth Trying in the Meantime
Between sessions, there are practical steps that might lighten the load a bit. Not fixes, but things that can make the days feel slightly more manageable.
Reach out to someone. It’s hard when you feel isolated. But send that text. Make that call. You don’t need a reason or an excuse. Hearing their voice can snap you out of feeling like you don’t exist.
Try volunteering if you’ve got the energy. Food banks get slammed in December. Shelters need people. Even a few hours helping someone else can pull you out of your own head. It’s also proof that you still have something to give, even when you feel empty.
Take a break from social media. Everyone’s timeline turns into a Christmas highlight reel this month. Perfect families. Perfect parties. Perfect lives. None of it’s real, though. You’re comparing your messy reality to everyone’s edited version, which just makes everything worse. Close the app, and take a break from it all.
Celebrate however you want. You can light a candle or cook something you actually like. Nobody says you have to celebrate the way everyone else does. Your version can be quiet, small, and completely different.
And if you need to cry? Cry. If you need to skip that party? Skip it. Stop piling guilt on top of everything else you’re dealing with. What you feel is what you feel.
Help Is Available When You’re Ready
January will come. The decorations will come down. The pressure will ease. This loneliness doesn’t have to follow you past December, though. You can find a different way forward.
Getting help isn’t weak, and it’s not admitting defeat. It’s choosing to speak to someone who’s trained to help you make sense of what you’re feeling. You’re choosing to heal and work toward real connection, rather than just pretending you’re fine.
You don’t need to hit rock bottom first. You don’t need to earn help by suffering long enough. If Christmas is hard for you right now, that’s enough reason.
Book a consultation at Supporting Wellness today. You deserve to feel less alone this December and beyond.